Life Shift Read Online Free Page A

had decided to move on, have a fresh start in a new home. Christine still passed the old house each day and had to restrain herself from asking Damien to stop the car so that she could get out, knock on the door and ask to go in. She dreamt of revisiting the old rooms - the bathroom, her bedroom, the kitchen. She yearned to touch the walls and the doors and to feel all the same feelings she had felt when living in that house.

    But what were those feelings? They weren't happiness. It hadn’t really been the happiest of childhoods. Money was tight, both her parents worked long hours, she barely saw them and when she did they were arguing, always arguing, about money. But for much of the time it was just Christine and her brother Paul. And then Paul started staying out too, leaving Christine alone. All she could do to fill the time was study. And so she did. And eventually she no longer noticed how lonely she was. The house and her text books were her company. And now as an adult she missed the comfort they had given her.   These days she couldn’t seem to find that same comfort anywhere else.

    Her parents had separated once too. She remembered them gathering Christine and Paul in the living room one Saturday morning. Her father began to talk in a broken voice. He was going to get help. He had hurt their mother too much. He had a problem with alcohol. He had lost his job. But no more. He would get help. He would change.

    Christine’s mother had just stared at the floor. It was difficult to tell whether she believed him or not, whether she even cared anymore. But they got through it. Somehow. Christine's father moved out for a few months, managed to get another job and cut down on his drinking. Eventually he moved back home. There was no fanfare, no big announcement. One morning Christine got up and he was there, downstairs, eating his breakfast. No one said anything so she kept quiet too. Sometimes that was best.

    There were far less arguments from that time on. Her father was quieter though – more prone to reflection. Where previously he had been the life and soul of the party, now he preferred to sit quietly on the sidelines, just observing. And Christine’s mother seemed to welcome this – the quietness, the stillness. The arguments had worn her out. Worn them both out.  

    And that was why her mother's tears this morning alarmed Christine. That wasn't how things were these days. Things hadn't been like that for a very long time.

    “What’s wrong Mum?” she asked again.

    “Your father’s had a letter,” said her mother, her lip trembling and her eyes looking ready to cry some more. “They’re finishing him in work.”

    Her father had worked on the buses since the time of the separation. Indeed it was that job that had marked the turning point in her parents’ lives- brought the separation to an end. He had been there years and had only just turned sixty. He wasn't ready to retire.

    “Why, what’s happening?”

    “Cut backs, cut backs,” said her mother angrily, “They’ve been threatening it for ages. But he won’t get his full pension. He wasn’t going to finish for another five years yet.”

    Christine didn’t know what to say. Her mother had always worried about money. But her father’s job had made things much easier for them.“How many years have you got left on the mortgage?” she asked.

    “Five. I’m going to need to find another job.” Her mother was pacing now and pulling anxiously at her sleeve.

    “Hold on. Hold on. You don’t know that yet. There’ll be an early retirement package won’t there? You don’t even know what that is yet.”

    “I know it won’t be enough. I’m sure of that.”

    “You don’t know that Mum. What does Dad say?”

    “He says we’ll cope and I’ve just got to stop buying nonsense. But what about Christmas?” Her mother started to cry again.

    “Christmas will be fine. Find out about the retirement package first and then see what