Less Than Nothing Read Online Free Page A

head. “Nothing.”
    “Really. What is it? What did I do?”
    “I like the way you say my name. That’s all.” Bam. Right cross to the jaw. With a hell of a follow-through. “How about giving it a try for a few hours, until lunchtime, and seeing how we do? If I’m wrong, I’ll make up the difference. What do you make by one on a weekday?”
    Damn him straight to hell for being so reasonable sounding. He could probably sell toasters to penguins.
    I calculate quickly. On a good day, maybe five dollars. Most of my money will come in the afternoon, maybe another whopping ten or fifteen bucks before it gets dark. “Usually? At least ten.”
    He nods. “That sounds about right. So let’s give it a whirl till one, and if we don’t have twenty bucks to split, we’ll call it a day and the difference is on me. If we have at least that much, or more, then it is in our best interests to forge an accord,” he says, his voice overly formal.
    I can’t help but smile. He’s kind of a goofball, for all his model looks and snake-oil-salesman charm. He’s actually not as confident as he pretends, I can see now. Which makes me feel better and at the same time…is endearing.
    I give him my black-belt ninja-level eye roll, which has the power to destroy worlds. It has no effect. Damn him again for his superpowers. I’ll have to try something else.
    He interprets my silence as an opportunity to keep pitching the idea. “You’ve got nothing to lose. It’s risk-free.”
    A thought occurs to me. “What happened to your last partner?”
    His face grows serious. “I had to kill him and eat him. It was a long winter.”
    “He?”
    “Don’t look at me like that. He was actually quite tender after a couple of days. The secret’s in the marinade.”
    I find myself laughing against my will, and he joins me, the dimples back in full force. I so want to say no, just to do it, but I’m also thinking it couldn’t hurt to give it a try. If he’s right, it might be the first Monday ever that I clear more than twenty bucks.
    “Seriously. What happened?”
    His expression darkens for a nanosecond, and then he brightens again. “He didn’t make it south. Stayed in the old country.” He watches me expectantly. “So how about it?”
    “You have the cash to cover any shortfall?”
    “I’m toting fat stacks. That’s how I roll.” He throws a hand sign that looks like he’s trying to make a shadow bunny. I giggle and then stop myself. I’m having too much fun, and Derek’s the enemy. Or at least, an adversary.
    Isn’t he?
    I nod and stand, avoiding spilling this time, and drain my coffee. “What if I say no?”
    “Then we’re going to be duking it out on the same block.”
    “And if I say yes, you’ll leave if it doesn’t work? No bullshit?”
    He held his hand over his heart. “Promise. You’ll never hear my voice again.”
    The thought gives me conflicting emotions, but I’m not going to let on. Right now I’m not sure what I’m feeling. I need time to sort it out. So that’s what I tell him.
    “I want the day to think about it.” I realize as I say the last word that I really want to say yes now, but I don’t want to come off as easy.
    “The whole day?”
    “Yup.”
    “Will you at least promise to give it a try tomorrow morning?”
    “No. But I’ll think about it.”
    He looks unhappy, but surprises me by nodding. “Okay. I’ll try to find another spot for now, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
    I keep my expression impassive, but I feel let down that he didn’t give it at least one more try. I would have said yes. Or at least, I might have.
    He hefts his bag, slides the strap handles over one shoulder, and lifts his guitar with the other. I’m not as fast, and he waits for me, and then we walk to the door together. He opens it and steps onto the sidewalk, nearly clobbering an Asian woman pushing a cart. He apologizes and earns an angry glare for his trouble.
    We stand facing each other for an