Grass for His Pillow Read Online Free Page A

it? Not Iida’s?”
    â€œI killed Iida before he could rape me. If it’s true there is a child, it can only be Takeo’s.”
    â€œWhen?” Shizuka whispered.
    â€œThe night Iida died. Takeo came to my room. We both expected to die.”
    Shizuka breathed out. “I sometimes think he is touched by madness.”
    â€œNot madness. Bewitchment, maybe,” Kaede said. “It’s as if we were both under a spell ever since we met in Tsuwano.”
    â€œWell, my uncle and I are partly to blame for that. We should never have brought you together.”
    â€œThere was nothing you or anyone could have done to prevent it,” Kaede said. Despite herself, a quiet intimation of joy stirred within her.
    â€œIf it were Iida’s child, I would know what to do,” Shizuka said. “I would not hesitate. There are things I can give you that will get rid of it. But Takeo’s child is my own kin, my own blood.”
    Kaede said nothing. The child may inherit Takeo’s gifts, she was thinking, those gifts that make him valuable. Everyone wanted to use him for some purpose of their own. But I love him for himself alone. I will never get rid of his child. And I will never let the Tribe take it from me. But would Shizuka try? Would she so betray me?
    She was silent for so long, Shizuka sat up to see if she had fallen asleep. But Kaede’s eyes were open, staring at the green light beyond the doorway.
    â€œHow long will the sickness last?” Kaede said.
    â€œNot long. And you will not show for three or four months.”
    â€œYou know about these things. You said you have two sons?”
    â€œYes. Arai’s children.”
    â€œWhere are they?”
    â€œWith my grandparents. He does not know where they are.”
    â€œHasn’t he acknowledged them?”
    â€œHe was interested enough in them until he married and had a son by his legal wife,” Shizuka said. “Then, since my sons are older, he began to see them as a threat to his heir. I realized what he was thinking and took them away to a hidden village the Muto family have. He must never know where they are.”
    Kaede shivered despite the heat. “You think he would harm them?”
    â€œIt would not be the first time a lord, a warrior, had done so,” Shizuka replied bitterly.
    â€œI am afraid of my father,” Kaede said. “What will he do to me?”
    Shizuka whispered, “Suppose Lord Shigeru, fearing Iida’s treachery, insisted on a secret marriage at Terayama, the day we visited the temple. Your kinswoman, Lady Maruyama, and her companion, Sachie, were the witnesses, but they did not live.”
    â€œI cannot lie to the world in that way,” Kaede began.
    Shizuka hushed her. “You do not need to say anything. It has all been hidden. You are following your late husband’s wishes. I will let it be known, as if inadvertently. You’ll see how these men can’t keep a secret among themselves.”
    â€œWhat about documents, proof?”
    â€œThey were lost when Inuyama fell, along with everything else. The child will be Shigeru’s. If it is a boy, it will be the heir to the Otori.”
    â€œThat is too far in the future to think about,” Kaede said quickly. “Don’t tempt fate.” For Shigeru’s real unborn child came into her mind, the one that had perished silently within its mother’s body in the waters of the river at Inuyama. She prayed that its ghost would not be jealous, she prayed her own child would live.
    Before the end of the week the sickness had eased a little. Kaede’s breasts swelled, her nipples ached, and she became suddenly, urgently hungry at unexpected times, but otherwise she began to feel well, better than she had ever felt in her life. Her senses were heightened almost as if the child shared its gifts with her. She noted with amazement how Shizuka’s secret information spread through the men