Gareth and th Lost Island Read Online Free Page B

the back. He grabbed a thin reed out of a
jar next to the stove with his finger like toes. Lighting one end
of the reed on an already lit gas flame, he ignited the hissing gas
burner. With a practiced swish, he waved the reed in the air fast
enough to put it out before placing it back in the jar. Henry
served up the bacon with one hand, and slid a plate of dry toast in
front of Gareth with his foot.
    “Thank you, Henry,” Gareth muttered as he tried to
decide if he could stomach even that small amount of food. Henry
shifted his balance to grab the honey bowl for Gareth. This motion
shifted Henry’s kilt, accidently flashing Gareth his family jewels.
“Henry, I know Chims wear a kilt because it doesn’t restrict their
freedom of movement like pants do, but that’s not something I want
to see this early in the morning,” he complained.
    Henry grunted, and whistled, while jerking his head
towards Tralnis.
    “Do I even want to know what he said?” Tralnis
inquired.
    “He said at least he didn’t dunk them in my tea, like
someone else he knows,” Gareth relayed.
    “I don’t know how many times I have to explain that.
I was drunk, and wondering if they called it ‘tea-bagging’ because
it felt similar to dunking the boys in a cup of tea. How was I to
know Henry had just poured you a fresh cup, and it was steaming
hot?” Tralnis complained. “Luckily, I had some wonderful burn
ointment on had,” he added.
    Not wanting to remember that particular evening,
Gareth decided to risk it, and try eating the toast. After
drizzling some honey over it, he took a large bite of the sweet and
crunchy combination. Unfortunately for Gareth, Henry chose that
moment to ask a question with a series of grunts and howls. The
mouthful of toast got stuck in Gareth’s throat, as he tried to
swallow and laugh at the same time. Henry took two, long steps, and
was behind Gareth in an instant. The Chim delivered a strong blow
to the back of the young man’s back with one of his large hands.
The blow was enough to dislodge the food, and get his friend
breathing once more.
    Tralnis watched the action from across the table.
When he was certain his skills as a doctor wouldn’t be needed, he
put down his paper in frustration. “You know, one of these days I
really should learn Chimmish,” he muttered to himself. “When you
are able to, Gareth, would you mind telling me what my butler said
that was funny enough to get you to choke on your food?” he
requested.
    Gareth glanced over at Henry, who was standing as if
expecting something. The look on his childhood friend’s face made
him chuckle again. When he got himself back under control, Gareth
looked at Tralnis, and bit his lip to keep from laughing. “Sorry
Tralnis, Henry was asking why you smelled like a horse’s ass when
we got home. He was worried you had tried having sex with a Centaur
again,” he explained.
    “What is this… remind a Dwarf of his past
humiliations day? You two are never going to let me forget that
little misadventure, are you?” Tralnis sighed.
    Gareth smiled, despite his hangover. “You fell off of
a stepstool, and dislocated your shoulder while buggering a
Centaur. You ended up with your arm in a sling for over a month.
That’s a story that bears repeating,” he reminded his father with a
smirk. Letting Tralnis off the hook, he looked back towards Henry,
who had finished brewing the tea with the additional herbs. “Do you
remember that Kraunish amulet I dug up on our last expedition?” he
asked. Henry nodded his head as he poured Gareth a cup of tea.
“Turns out, I was partially correct in deciphering the runes. It
did provide a means for escape, but the ‘Unholy Winds’ it mentions
came from a different source than I expected. I suspect the
talisman was originally sold in a Kraunish joke shop,” he
explained. After putting Gareth’s teacup in front of him, Henry
lifted the back of his kilt and fanned it as if getting rid of a
foul smell. Gareth