Free to Love Read Online Free Page B

ends. He was the rebel, I was the compliant one.” She could hear the escalating tension edging his voice, see his frown deepen. “Years ago, when Kyle was a senior in high school and I was living at home and commuting to the university,” he continued, “Kyle told Mom and Dad he wasn’t going into medicine like everyone else in the family had. At first our parents were livid, then eventually their anger mellowed to bitter disappointment.”
    “Yes,” she said, biting her lip. “Even if Kyle hadn’t told me that, I would've sensed it anyway. The weekends your folks visited us, I caught snatches of conversation between Kyle and your father. Though it was obvious all was forgiven, they sometimes still hashed it out.”
    “At least Kyle didn’t leave behind any unresolved issues between them,” he said as he stopped to angle her a look.
    “Yes, thank goodness.” She paused, then encouraged, “But getting back to your story about Kyle’s senior year...”
    He started pacing again. “Yes. That was a difficult time. And I guess I didn’t help matters either.”
    “What do you mean?”
    “Secretly, I admired my little brother’s gutsiness, though at first I was careful not to let our folks know. Even if I had wanted to be something other than a veterinarian, I knew that I, the dutiful elder son, would never have had the courage to strike out on my own like Kyle. Call it the prodigal son story—whatever that’s how it happened.”
    “But did Kyle rebel only to be different, or did he truly want to be a firefighter?” she asked. From every indication she’d gleaned, Kyle’s dedication to the department had always been totally sincere.
    Austin leaned against the opposite wood-paneled wall and pinned her with his gaze. “Kyle wanted it. Pure and simple. Even when he was a little kid, his favorite toy trucks were fire engines. When he moved on to high school, then had to choose a senior project before graduation, he applied for volunteer training at the local substation not far from our home.”
    “So it shouldn’t have come as any big surprise to your parents when Kyle made his final announcement,” she pointed out.
    “No, it shouldn’t have, but it did. I guess they were holding out hope till the very last minute.” He picked up a color photograph of his brother from the corner bookshelf and turned it over. His voice grew thick with emotion. “When things got really heated, I finally broke my silence and openly sided with Kyle. I... I was the one who encouraged him to stick to his dreams, Jo. I even helped him send away for information, traveled with him to various community colleges to help him determine which one offered the bet fire science program.” He set the picture back down, his jaw rigid. “If I hadn’t done that, maybe Kyle would be alive today.”
    “Oh, no, Austin!” She couldn’t hold back the alarm from her voice. “You mustn’t beat yourself up that way!”
    A muscle in his neck twitched. “And if that’s not bad enough,” he went on as through not having heard her, “now I come along and remind you of Kyle. Maybe I should leave, Jo. Maybe my being here is sabotaging your very reason for relocating.”
    “No. Please stay.” Her words sounded distant, as if spoken by someone else. Perhaps it was her ambivalence that had muted that plea, she couldn’t be sure. While one part of her urged to send him immediately on his way, the other part yearned for his continued presence. “I’ll get through it, honest I will. I think... I think I’m starting to already.”
    “Oh?”
    She nodded. “Yesterday when we visited Anchorhold, and I could see for myself the good work going on there, I felt a little more alive. I began to care about the things that have always been important to me—the marine wildlife and birds, preserving our planet.”
    She sat back down at the breakfast nook again and added with quiet conviction, “I’m ready now to get back in touch with that part of my