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comfort him, but feeling as I did, I doubted it helped. I was ready to crawl out of my own skin just to shed the anticipation I was feeling, and I’m sure he could tell.
    “Well if they follow the same delivery route as last year, I should get my letter first. As soon as I get it, I’ll head over to your house to test that theory,” he teased. Then he gave me a smile that made my insides melt.
    “Okay.” I smiled back at him. “I…”
    “Alexandria, come say hello to your Aunt Irena,” my mom yelled upstairs to me.
    “Great, this just might take all day. I gotta go.”
    Byron waved goodbye and I tapped the tablet off.
    “Alexandria,” Mom called impatiently.
    “I’m coming.” I rolled my eyes as I headed down the stairs. The only reason my mom wanted me to talk to Aunt Irena was so that she didn’t have to. Irena was Dad’s little sister. Whenever she spoke to him she was as sweet as pie – but she was beyond catty the second he turned away. Despite my mom never participating, she constantly competed to one-up her on everything. Even the fact that she had two children was some kind of victory to her. Like a fertile womb was something she had any control over.
    Two years ago, her oldest son Leroy had received a purple letter. Since then she had simply been unbearable. Every word out of her mouth was ‘Leroy this’ or ‘Leroy that’. Once I had asked my mom how she could stand even a minute of talking to the insufferable woman. My mom simply explained that through all the years of Aunt Irena trying to one-up her, she had yet to come up with a real one-up that was something she, and not Mother Nature or someone else around her, had accomplished. Aunt Irena managed a sandwich shop and didn’t even like eating sandwiches. My mom theorized that the only reason Aunt Irena enjoyed thinking she’d one-upped her is because she was so unhappy with her own life.
    I tried to remind myself of that conversation as I took the tablet from my mother’s hand.
    “Oh. Hi, Alex,” she purred at me in her usual snooty tone.
    “It’s Alexandria or Lexi . I don’t go by Alex,” I calmly explained for what must be the millionth time.
    “You must be so nervous right now. Don’t you worry: Leroy and I both have our fingers crossed for you, and we keep thinking ‘blue, not red’. ” She looked to her right and started rubbing her finger against her teeth. The woman didn’t even have the common courtesy to look at me when she talked. She’d rather pick at her breakfast in the mirror.
    Eventually, she realized I wasn’t responding, so she continued talking as if I had. “Now, Leroy and I didn’t get the tiniest bit nervous as he waited for his letter. But we knew he had tested better than any of his classmates. We weren’t about to waste energy fretting over it. Of course, his letter just showed that we were right. But don’t you feel bad that you’re nervous; most students are.” She started fluffing her over-processed hair in the mirror, still not looking at me.
    I began to wonder if she was even listening to me. “Actually, I got my letter this morning. It was rainbow striped and it said I could pick the level and job of my choosing. So of course I chose to be gold level hippopotamus trainer.”
    Out of the corner of my eye I could see my mom’s face wavering between stern disapproval and hysterical amusement.
    My aunt stopped applying her bright red lipstick and looked at her mirror confused. “What did you say, Alex?”
    “My name is Alexandria or Lexi . I don’t go by Alex,” I responded flatly.
    “Oh, that’s nice, Alex. Oh, Leroy’s trying to call me now. I have to go. Tell your mom to call me after you get your letter.” She gave a half-wave and tapped the connection off. Well at least Leroy was good for something.
    Shaking my head, I turned to my mom. It looked like laughter had won: she convulsed with silent hysterics. “Mom, promise me one thing. If by some miracle I get a gray or silver