around here.” It was nice we shared a respect for the area. I saw it with new eyes: I couldn’t explain , but he knew. It was quiet between us for a dozen or so seconds. My eyes were fixed on the water, until I realized we were both quiet. I looked at him, noticing he may have been looking my way for a while. I smiled, acknowledging his look, but my smile faded as I watched his stare travel from my eyes to my lips and back. He drew me into those deep green eyes of his and I felt hypnotized. I didn’t move. I don’t even know if I breathed. He moved closer. I felt the warmth of his breath on my neck, and the touch of his fingers on my hand, my wrist, my arm, until he rested his hand on my shoulder. When he moved away a little I put my hand on his arm. He paused with his face an inch from mine. He looked into my eyes waiting…just waiting. Then he swept his lips across mine. Moving his hand from my shoulder to my cheek he started to kiss me, gentle at first. Once I responded things changed and the kisses deepened. Then I panicked. I pulled away. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but I just couldn’t. Then I saw the look on his face.
“I’m sorry, I just...” I didn’t know what to say.
“No, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed anything. We were having such a great time.” He looked wounded.
I was at a loss for words, but I wanted to fix this. I searched for what would help. “I’m having a great time.” I paused and found a little smile . “And it’s not like you took advantage of me or anything.” I tried to joke, but he didn’t appear to appreciate it. I thought I ’d explain. “I like you Scott, and I really enjoy your company. But…”
“I know, Shayla told me.” At least I was off the hook for that explanation. I still felt badly. He continued. “Look, I know you’re leaving in a couple of days, I just really felt like, I don’t know, there’s something between us. I’m not trying to pressure you or anything.”
“There is something .” I relaxed. He was right, there was something. “But, our timing…” He nodded while I was in mid-sentence. I smiled. “It sucks.” With that, we both let out a nervous laugh and tried to recover the evening. I stretched my legs in front of me while he fidgeted, both of us trying to break the awkwardness. Then I had an idea that could turn this weirdness into fun. It was risky. Some guys would take it the wrong way. Somehow I knew I was safe with Scott. He “got” me. And that was rare.
“Come on.” I took his hand and led him down by the water. “Turn around.” He looked confused but turned around anyway. I slipped out of my dress, staying in my bra and panties and jumped into the black lake. It was bold, I know, but we needed to stop being so serious and have some fun. And that’s exactly what happened. The tone changed fast. He turned around at the sound of my splash, surprised and smiling. He started to unbutton his shirt then paused waving to me to turn around. I did, treading water to give him privacy. I heard him jump in, and he was next to me in a flash. We swam out to the dock just splashing and playing. It was light and exactly what I needed. It was the n that I knew I was on the mend.
FOUR
Back to LA
The week at home was just what I needed. I felt the rotation of the earth increase as I headed south of the Bay Bridge as I usually did. I was a girl on a mission: start my internship and focus on the events ahead. I was going to work hard, and make sure they didn’t regret giving me this amazing opportunity. I’d left early, really early, hoping to miss the traffic. My brother taught me this little trick, and although I hated doing anything at four in the morning except sleeping, I got up and headed out. As I left the Bay Area behind me, the fog lifted and the sun reflected off the bay in my rearview mirror. I thought of Scott and hoped maybe someday our timing would be better. Meanwhile, I was warding off all men