That's why it made sense to just limit yourself to other Supes. Being with a human meant a lot of time with the lights off so your partner didn't notice your eyes going golden. As a potential alpha, I had enough control to keep the gold out of my eyes most of the time, but that didn't mean it was easy. Being with another Supe felt like unbuttoning too tight jeans—just a sense of relief. At that point I had never “come out” as a Supe to a human before. Brian had been a lot of fun, but definitely not boyfriend material. And I sure wasn't ready for a relationship at the age of nineteen.
A couple of months later, Jacob had shown up at my door. His excuse was that our father was getting worse—but I knew he just wanted to see what life was like away from the Pack. Not that he'd ever leave it. He had that disturbing mixture of envy and contempt he wore like a bad piece of clothing. I showed him around. I treated him nice, but the second evening had ended with him slashing my sofa with his claws. I broke his arm (which healed in a few minutes while it took me a lot longer to buy a new sofa). I didn't see him again until I came back to Run with the Pack three months later.
Father did look a little worse after not seeing him for awhile. Werewolves can heal from almost any injury (other than weapons made of silver or beheadings)--but he had a genetic disorder. There's no cure for that. He seemed as strong as ever. When we Ran, he was at the head of the Pack—from his own strength—not by sliding by on his status. But we had known for years the calendar wasn't his friend.
The time I spent in Seattle away from the Pack increased. I was always able to find one excuse or another. I joined a couple of sports teams. Found out I was a natural at soccer, although I had to always hold back with my strength. The gay swim-team was a perfect match for me, where there was no way I might seriously injure another player the way I might in soccer. The water resistance was a constant reminder for me not to break any world records for speed. When I turned twenty-one I took a job at the gay bar I had been at most weekends with my fake ID.
Working first as a bar-back and then as a bouncer let me use my strength in a way that didn't call attention to myself. I also loved checking IDs at the door, since it gave me a chance to sniff out other Supes. Supes didn't tend to get damaged the way humans did if sex got a little fierce. If I had just stayed with my Pack I would never had had the opportunity to even meet so many different members of the Supernatural community, let alone bed them.
Dallas My arms were around him, but my thoughts were on the head that was a few feet away from Jacob's body. The smell of his blood was overwhelming me. Bringing down a deer is such a turn on in terms of the scent of fresh blood. But the Wolf tinged smell of human blood was in a whole other league. When something like this happened, it was always a reminder of how easy it would be to give in to instinct and start hunting humans.
The first Pack I belonged to after I left New Orleans had a Challenge after I had been there for a couple of months—two Runs. I had barely had enough time to get to know most people's names, let alone all the unspoken affiliations, favors owed, and unforgiving enemies. Shit, I had only slept with three other Pack members. For me that was like having my virginity restored. I think it was the longest I've gone without sex since I starting getting hairs on my balls… Find the rest of the story in Eye of Wolf.