Boys Beware Read Online Free Page B

it will be my turn. I will stand up, and stretch, and say,
“Gosh,”
meaning, “Now I am going to go and have a look.” And Ali will be completely mystified! I suppose it is a bit mean, keeping her in the dark, but really she is not in the least bit interested. Tash and I are just waiting for the day when one of us bursts in and cries, “Gosh!!!” meaning that at long last there has been a sighting.
    We could, of course, just go downstairs and knock on the door and give him an invitation. We have discussed this, but Tash is worried in case he turns out to be hideous. I said, “How hideous could he be?” and we speculated for a while, and frightened ourselves with visions of a Kevin Trodd type creature, so now we have decided that we will give him until the weekend to show himself. If by then we still haven’t managed to check him out we shall have to ask Auntie Jay. We would really rather not as we know she’ll only laugh, but we certainly don’t want any Kevin Trodds turning up!
    Thursday
    Meg has promised that she will try to get her cousin Tom to come to the party and Zoella says that she knows a boy she can bring, so things are definitely starting to look up! We asked Ali this evening who she’s going to invite. She said she hadn’t thought of invitinganyone. She thought it was our party, not hers.
    It made us feel guilty, when she said that. We do have this tendency to leave her out of things.
    “You must
at least
ask Louise, “I said.
    Tash said yes, and anyone else she could think of. “Like any boys you might know, for example.”
    We live in hope!
    I have just been reading through Mum’s list of Do’s and Don’ts, which she stuck on the back of the door before she left. This is the first time I’ve really looked at them. These are some of the things that we must DO:
    . Check cooker is turned off before leaving home
    . Check taps are turned off in sink and bath . Check TV is turned off
    . Check windows are closed
    . Check door of food cupboard is closed
    . Check door of fridge is shut properly.
    Oh, and CHECK IN WITH AUNTIE JAY BEFORE GOING TO SCHOOL AND AGAIN ON RETURN. We have had long lectures on that one.
    As for the others … all I can say is, well! I can understand about the food cupboard, cos if Fat Man got in there and found anything even remotely consumable he would eat himself silly, but
the door of the fridge?
Pur-lease! Does she really think we are dumb enough to leave a fridge door open???
    Still haven’t seen him downstairs.

    Friday
    Got back from school to find huge puddle of water on carpet. Thought at first that Fat Man had had an accident, but not even Fat Man could wee that much. In any case, he has his litter tray in the bathroom. It was Tash who traced it to the fridge … the door was open just the
tiniest crack,
and all the insides had melted. I cried, “Which blithering idiot didn’t shut the door properly?” I knew it couldn’t be me. I mean, I had read Mum’s list of Do’s and Don’ts.
    “Who was the last one to go there?” said Tash.
    We both looked at Ali.
    “Who put the milk away after breakfast?”
    “You did,” said Ali.

    “Me?” I was outraged. How dare she blame me? “What about the butter? Who put the butter away?”
    “The same person that put the milk away?” said Tash.
    It’s not true! I’m sure I didn’t put the butter away. I didn’t even touch the blasted butter. I bet it was Tash!
    We have come to the conclusion that there is obviously something wrong with the fridge door, since it takes such a superhuman effort to close it. We’d rather not tell Auntie Jay in case she thinks it’s something we’ve done, so Ali has come up with the bright idea – she gets them, occasionally – of leaving a bucket of water jammed in front of it. It is simple, but it does seem to work. In the meantime we have mopped up the floor and just hope that nothing has leaked down through the ceiling into the O’Shaugnessys’ flat, but we don’t think it