Bookmark Days Read Online Free Page B

came back to earth. ‘I know I go on about it. It’s my life. What am I supposed to do, pretend it doesn’t exist? Pretend I can’t pick up because it’d make you feel better?’
    ‘No, that’s not it. I’m happy for you,’ I said. ‘It’s just that I get smothered by your stories. You never stop to breathe.’
    ‘Okay, okay, okay, you’re right. It’s your turn now, I promise.’
    ‘That’s not it, either. I don’t have any stories you’d want to hear. You’d smile and yawn and then you’d get sick of my stories the way I’m sick of yours .’
    ‘Sorrrreeee. What do you want then?’
    ‘Silence.’
    She didn’t know how to handle that. For a moment she was silent.
    ‘Okay,’ she whispered. ‘Goodnight.’
    I woke to the gentle sounds of Hoppy making himself a cup of tea in the kitchen. It was just after five and Katie was dead to the world. I collected my clothes, dressed as quietly as I could – letting the sleeping cousin lie – poured myself a cup of tea and sat at the table with Hoppy and the calmness of morning.
    ‘What are you up to today?’ I asked.
    My grandad shrugged. ‘Just the usual. Bit of this, bit of that. Have a go at fixing the pump out at the big dam.’
    ‘Mind if I come with you?’
    He raised his grey caterpillar eyebrows. ‘Sure. What about your cousins?’
    ‘I’ll catch up with them later.’
    We didn’t exchange another word after that until we were in the ute and rumbling across the paddock towards the big dam. Champ was in the back, barking his lungs out at a mob of red kangaroos we’d disturbed. One by one they sprang over the fence into the bush paddock. I slowed the ute and let them take their time.
    ‘Beautiful, aren’t they?’ Hoppy mumbled.
    I nodded. It seemed strange that my grandad could see the beauty in a mob of roos who were in direct competition with the sheep for feed. Just goes to prove he’s not made entirely of grumpiness.
    The big dam was like a sheet of glass resting in the red soil and we unloaded tools quietly, as if any noise would ruin the serenity.
    ‘Had enough of your cousins already?’ Hoppy asked.
    ‘Sort of. I don’t know. Katie never shuts up.’
    Hoppy chuckled. ‘I had noticed.’
    ‘I think the amount of talking she’s done in the last couple of days is normally shared between six friends. It’s all a bit much for me sometimes.’
    I said that, and then I felt guilty. ‘I wish I had half her confidence. A quarter. I don’t think she has a shy bone in her body.’
    ‘That’s just a matter of practice.’
    ‘I don’t think so. You’ve either got it or you haven’t.’
    Hoppy took the cover off the pump. He was shaking his head. ‘Katie spends her life surrounded by people. Living out here has lots of advantages but they come at a price. You don’t get much of a chance to hang around with kids your own age.’
    ‘I don’t mind.’
    ‘Yes. You’re probably like your father in that way and quite happy with your own company most of the time. But you have to broaden out a bit, see the world and you don’t want that silly habit of shyness getting in the way. Know what I mean?’
    ‘Yeah,’ I said.
    ‘You’re not shy with me,’ he said.
    ‘Well, no. You’re family. That’s different.’
    ‘Is it? Maybe that’s all you need to do. Maybe you just have to pretend everyone you meet is part of your family. Just keep pretending until that becomes a habit.’
    It made sense in a Hoppy sort of way. I didn’t want to be Katie, though. If I had the power of self-confidence I’d use it to spread a bit of happiness, not . . . well, not the way Katie does. ‘You’re full of wisdom today.’
    He shrugged and knelt so his eyes were level with the pump’s carburettor. ‘Not really. I’ve had to work a few things out for myself, that’s all. Like the new lambs, you know. They’re shaky on their feet to begin with but they eventually work it out.’
    ‘Baaa,’ I said.
    He chuckled then swung around.