A Perfect Crime Read Online Free Page A

things first?
    Can we talk?
    Sure,
she replied.
    I called her. ‘Can you come, then?’
    There was no sound on the other end. She didn’t want to. She was nice to everyone, but I creeped her out. I was an inconvenience.
    ‘Forget I said anything. It doesn’t matter,’ I said, and hung up.
    After a while she sent a message.
    I’ll be there. Don’t be upset. No matter how bad things get, they can always be fixed. Trust me.
    Thanks.
    My reply was deliberately cold. But I was relieved. She was coming.
    Old Mr He was making a stir-fry next door; I could hear the metal spoon scraping the bottom of the wok. The sound made my teeth hurt. I took pleasure in knowing that his stupid mutt would soon be dead.
    I changed into a T-shirt, put on my cap and went downstairs. It was nearly time for the guards to swap shift. I slapped my flip-flops against the tarmac so that they echoed. The guard looked at me sideways, his hands stuck firmly to the seams of his trousers and his body still, like a sculpture. I walked closer to get a better look. Sweat poured from his hat like rain from the eaves. His fingertips and buttocks were trembling from the strain.
    I coughed a few times while I thought of something to say.
    ‘Hey, buddy, are you on duty this afternoon?’
    He turned his face ninety degrees like a robot to look at me and saluted.
    ‘Yes, until 3.00.’
    ‘I’ve got a friend coming at 2.00. Could you let them in?’
    ‘What does he look like?’
    ‘It’s a girl.’
    He smiled meaningfully.
    I removed my cap and fanned myself. ‘It’s roasting,’ I said.
    ‘Sure is,’ he said, taking a moment to relax.
    He obviously wanted to chat, but I sauntered off. I loathed everything about his life. I wasn’t going to become friends with him.
    There were still a few more hours to kill, so I found a struggling barber’s shop, walked in and announced, ‘My hair’s a mess. I want it sorted.’
    They swooped like sparrows, switching on the electric fan, making tea, moving chairs. How did I want it washed? What style was I thinking of? I flicked through a magazine, but they were all hideous.
    ‘Got anything more normal?’
    They fetched another magazine filled with squeaky- clean Japanese and Korean youths. I gesticulated, trying to describe what I wanted, but I couldn’t. At that moment an ageless news anchor appeared on the TV
    ‘Like that,’ I said, pointing.
    I stared at the TV and suddenly it occurred to me that the broadcaster’s every movement, his every word, was a perfect display of his suitability for the job. I asked for pen and paper and started making notes. If you wantto gain people’s respect and trust quickly you have to adhere to the following principles:
    1 Dress in clean, plain clothing in a palette of sombre colours.
    2 Keep hair in a neat side-parting pushed back to the right. No hair must ever fall out of place. Wash it regularly to keep it looking healthy and shiny.
    3 Don’t be too expressive.
    4 All movements should be sedate, natural and moderate.
    5 Head should be kept upright, chin ever so slightly pulled back and a sincere smile should be adopted at all times.
    6 Eyes shouldn’t be too open, nor should they glaze over. They should be bright, mild and focused straight ahead (if angled slightly downwards). The person in front of you is always the most important person in the room.
    I examined myself in the mirror, but the face staring back at me was the very opposite of this description. My eyes were cold and detached, the corners of my mouth were pulled downwards, my beard was stubbly, my hair pointed in all directions. Lethargy and boredom,which seemed to have grown in me over the years, were etched into my face. I may not have been a criminal yet, but I made a good suspect.
    I tried imitating the broadcaster’s demeanour, but it wasn’t easy. Hardest to capture was his overall sense of decorum, and for a while the hairdresser and I found my attempt the funniest thing in the world. But my eyes