A Marriage Carol Read Online Free Page A

for advice. Nothing works. We’re just not right for each other.”
     
    “But you were, at one point?”
     
    “In the beginning, sure. Anyone can stay in love at the beginning, I think. But through the years, and with the kids, we just grew apart. He threw himself into his work and hobbies, and my heart turned toward the children.”
     
    “And here you are twenty years later, strangers.”
     
    “Exactly.”
     
    “Tell me about your children. How old are they?”
     
    As he crumbled his cornbread into his chili, I told him everything. All the way down to what David said in the bathroom while he was sitting, studying the patterns in the tile. The man laughed with me and shook his headlike it was his own grandchild.
     
    “You mentioned a pastor,” he said as he finished his chili and placed the bowl on the coffee table. “What about your spiritual life?”
     
    I laughed, though it wasn’t funny, and stared at the fire. “I know it’s not true, but it almost feels like I don’t have any right to talk to God.”
     
    “Why would you say that?”
     
    “Because I know it’s a sin to get a divorce. That’s how I was raised. And once God is ticked off at you, He won’t listen to your prayers.”
     
    “Well, it’s true that God hates divorce. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t talk with Him. He’s a forgiving God. And part of the reason He hates divorce is the pain and heartache it creates in the people He loves.”
     
    “You sound like a pastor.”
     
    He smiled. “I guess in a way I am. You came across the field, didn’t you? You didn’t see the sign in front.”
     
    “What sign? I couldn’t see ten feet in front of my face.”
     
    “Years ago this place was a funeral home. Didn’t get much business way out here, so they sold it. We turned it into a retreat center. For struggling couples. Peoplewho’ve given up or those who just want to grow closer.” He pointed at the pictures in the bookshelf. “Some of our graduates.”
     
    I couldn’t hold back the laughter. “That has to be the definition of irony. I take shelter at a marriage retreat that used to be a funeral home.”
     
    “I don’t think it’s by chance that you’re here.” He spoke with an edge of certainty.
     
    “You saved all of those marriages?”
     
    “Not me. And sadly, not all of them were saved. People make their own choices. We can’t control what anyone does, but we can be there to walk with them. Many were right on the brink, like you. From where I sit, I’d say you were allowed this divine appointment for a purpose.”
     
    “Or maybe that eighteen-wheeler was God’s way of punishing us for what we were about to do.”
     
    “I prefer to think of it as a wake-up call. It’s never too late to do something good for your marriage.”
     
    I shook my head. “We’ve made up our minds. There’s no hope left.”
     
    He folded his wrinkled hands and looked at the pictures. “I’ve heard that a few times over the years. And I’d like to suggest something about hope. Why don’t youand your husband hold on to the hope I have for you?”
     
    “A man we can’t even find?”
     
    “A man who probably doesn’t want to go through with this any more than you.”
     
    “How can you say that? You don’t even know him. You don’t know me.”
     
    He pursed his lips. “I’m going on experience. Most people don’t want to throw away their marriage. Working together for twenty years and giving a lot of money to lawyers doesn’t make sense.”
     
    “You’re right about that. The lawyer Jacob found is cut-rate. The only reason he would stay with me is if he could save money, not because of love.”
     
    “So you’re going through with the divorce even though you know it’s not the answer. You just don’t see another way out.”
     
    Though I wanted to change the subject, I couldn’t. The old man had nailed my inner feelings. His questions led me further toward the hurt and betrayal I felt at my